Man Has ‘Visceral Reaction’ to Wife’s Request for His Next Tattoo

One wife’s request has thrown her husband for a loop. 

A 30-year-old man shared a post on Reddit’s “Am I Overreacting?” forum, asking for input on his predicament. 

The OP (original poster) shared that he recently decided to get his first tattoo “after a long 2 years of consideration,” to commemorate “a pretty large life change.” 

The man noted that he had “healed a lot of trauma” from his childhood and had begun to see a therapist to “manage my depression,” both of which have helped him at this stage in his life. 

After “a ton of research,” he landed on an artist he “LOVED” and finalized an original design with a quote from a book series as well as a “symbol of strength.”

The OP said the tattoo has “brought so much joy,” but noted that his 34-year-old wife had a different reaction to the body art. 

“One of the first things she said was ‘the next one you get has to be about me,’ “ the OP claimed. “For some reason, this sent my entire body into a flight mode. I laughed a little and said ‘Uuuuuhhh, what?’ and she doubled down saying, ‘If I want to get another one it has to be about her because of how expensive it was.’ “

The husband said he had a “visceral reaction” to his wife’s comments, and that his own response “threw me for a loop.” 

“I felt as if I had lost autonomy in a way and knew if I said ‘no’ it would start a fight,” he explained. “We have been married for 10 years, and the only other time I felt this way was when she said I couldn’t get a nose piercing because ‘it would change my face.’ I got my ears pierced after a TON of pushback and a lot of comments after they were done saying ‘you’ve just changed your face and it’s different than what I’m used to.’ “

The OP then asked for advice from the online community, saying he feels like he “should be free to do whatever I like with my own body, as I believe she is.” 

The majority of commenters agreed with the man, saying his wife crossed a line with her comments. 

“Absolutely not,” one commenter wrote. “I can understand discussing the money part if y’all share finances but her controlling what you do with your body is really messed up.”

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Another agreed, saying, “That’s a pretty gross thing for your wife to say, and I REALLY dislike that she said it. I think she sounds horribly controlling of what you do with your own body, and I don’t think I could get past that if I were you.”

Some even urged the OP to leave his wife, writing, “You’re not a doll. Please consider leaving. You are not overreacting, she’s denying you your agency over your body because of her preferences. This is wrong, and you deserve better.”