Parents Respond After Their ‘Strict’ Rules for Kids Spark Backlash Online

An influencer couple is responding after videos they made detailing their “strict” parenting style went viral.

Ssonia Ong, a content creator known for her account, the “Ong Squad,” where she makes family-focused content surrounding her life with her five children and husband, Kevin, responded to comments on a video of hers where the pair detailed the rules they have for their children.

“May as well set the bar high,” the influencer, who has nearly 11 million TikTok followers, wrote in the caption of the video, where she specifically detailed the couple’s rules for their children’s education.

In a statement to PEOPLE, Ong also provided more context behind the rules. “We created these rules as guidelines based on what we know and what has worked well in our experience,” she says. “We are not authoritarians and recognize that every child is different, each with their own strengths and personality.”

“The most important thing is that they feel confident and safe in talking to us about these topics,” she wrote. “It is said that strict parents make sneaky kids. There is probably some truth to this. That’s why we ensure that our kids understand the reasoning behind the rules. If they internalize good values, they can make better choices in the future.”

While the couple listed five rules that they enforce in their home surrounding schooling, the first rule sparked much more debate in the comments than the others.

“Straight A’s are expected,” read the text over the clip, as one of the pair’s five children danced across the screen.

People in the comments expressed their opinions on the mandate, with many arguing that the rule was far too “strict.”

“I disagree with the straight A’s… too much pressure,” wrote one user.

Another, however, was inclined to agree with the Ongs, writing, “Getting straight A’s is too much pressure. both A’s and B’s are good.”

Ssonia told PEOPLE that she and her husband offer support to their children when they are struggling, stating that they wouldn’t suffer consequences for not achieving straight A’s.

“One of our kids has ADHD and needs extra support,” she wrote. “Their diagnosis does not define them and neither does their grades. Our message is that through hard work and perseverance, with the right supports, they can achieve their goals.”

The commenter also addressed one of the parents’ other rules mandating college as a necessity for their children, writing, “And you don’t have to go to college to be successful. should you graduate from high school, yes. but college should be a choice.”

Commenters also had mixed reactions to the parents’ expectations for college, with many supporting the Ongs in their goal.

“Y’all complaining but I’d rather have parents that would help me get to college and have goals for me,” one user said.

“They don’t have to go to college you know they might want to do physical work and you can’t stop them I’m assuming u will kick them out,” another disagreed.

However, Ssonia made it clear that her children wouldn’t face consequences like being kicked out if they didn’t go to college, writing back, “No one will ever get kicked out.”

“I think college being a must is not good,” wrote one user. “Not every kids will be successful or happy with college. The trades are good too. They wouldn’t be less of a person if they go into the trades.”

Ssonia acknowledged the commenter’s argument, writing, “You make a great point. Trades are very much needed and the payout is 👌”

As for the couple’s other rules? Their children must read 30 minutes a day and are able to buy unlimited books to support the habit. Ssonia tells PEOPLE that her kids often read much more than this voluntarily. Additionally, screens are allowed for their children, but only on the weekends.

Some commenters had questions relating to the children’s own desires for their hobbies.

“What if they don’t like reading?” wrote one.

Ssonia admitted that one of their children actually didn’t like to read at all, so they use audiobooks and comics to supplement the child’s learning.

This is not the first “rules” post that the couple has made. In June, the pair made a more general video detailing their other rules, including that the children re not allowed to have social media until they are 16, no sleepovers (though they can host sleepovers at their own house), no crop tops and no dating until college.

As a content creator, Ssonia says she understands the dangers that come along with social media.

“There is evidence to suggest that social media use is linked to depression. Our hope is to delay in order to protect their real-life interactions, sleep, and mental well-being.”

“Guys, this is NOT strict it’s basic rules 😭,” wrote one exasperated commenter.

Others weighed in on whether the kids would break any of the rules, with one specifically targeting the dating rule, saying, “I feel like the no dating one is the one they’re going to break.”

Ssonia, for her part, wrote back, “You might be right.”

However, Ssonia, who is a graduate of both Stanford and Harvard, tells PEOPLE that having met Kevin when she was in undergrad and he in medical school, “allowed us to focus on our academics and establish our career paths early on.”

“Our kids have said they want to be doctors and we are trying to prepare them for what will be a long and arduous journey,” she wrote. “At the end of the day, we want them to be successful in both their careers and their relationships.”